The power of definition

Imagine that! The solar system could be about to expand while we
sleep. (“Three rocks from the sun spark war of the worlds”, The Age
17/8) A planetary realignment? A deep space invasion? The end of the
world? No. All it takes is a committee, and maybe a thesaurus. New
definition, and presto! – three new planets. Who says meetings are a
waste of time?

I advise the PM to recruit some of those astronomer guys fast. The
possibilities … Can’t get a bill through the Senate? Redefine the
term “majority”, and double your numbers. Petrol prices embarassing?
Redefine “debit” and “credit”, and we’ll be paying less. Too many
boat people? Redefine “Australia”, and send them all to Mt Isa.
Unemployment figures a problem? Redefine “work”, and … Oh yeah, you
already have.

Forget I mentioned it.


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